I gotta guy/relationship/friend question?

[WP~Paint]

So I have a boyfriend but one of the guys I had been talking to, were still friends. We were texting today and I started telling him about how my boyfriend and I had plans and then he got a text to go boating with some friends...Normally I could care less, but we had plans to go out and he just kinda blew me off...Is it ok to have a guy friend to talk to and I guess get advice from...I have never really had a guy friend like that...What do you all think?

[Kara]

I always believe that guys and girls can't be friends because one side always wanted more. thats my opinion and most likely you bf will get jealous....

[WashingtonBay]

Does the boyfriend know about the friend?

That can be an indication of whether it's "OK".


Intent (on everyone's part), trust and trustworthiness is key here. Given that you're using this friendship to complain about your relationship.... that's not usually a healthy thing, for the relationship. If anyone has cause to think it might lead to trouble, real or not, then you should err on the side of caution and curtail that, if you care about the boyfriend. While you don't need to end the friendship, I would make sure that it's 'open' and beyond reasonable doubt, by 'the couple' being friends with this guy, not just you.

[WP~Paint]

He has already said he doesn't care who I am friends with. My friend gave some great advice too. I'm not really sure where it's going with my boyfriend, so I'm not sure I am super worried about it...I am starting to see differences...He doesn't really care for animals, doesn't care for the idea of kids, so I'm just not too sure anymore. Idk...I'm going to hang out with one of my girl friends tonight and see what she thinks...Her boyfriend and her are friends with my boyfriend, and have been for a while now...hopefully she can give me some insight.

[WP~Paint]

WB, my boyfriend and my friend are friends, not like super good friends, but we all hang out from time to time...I just don't know...I hope my girlfriend can help me tonight...We're going shopping, so we should be able to figure it out.

[WashingtonBay]

Sounds reasonable... You're young, and so, I think, is this relationship.

Just don't let yourself fall into anything you couldn't be completely truthful about to anybody, and usually you're OK.

Careful telling the friends too much. These decisions are between you and your boyfriend. Not his friends. Sharing too much is not respectful of the intimacy in the relationship.

[WP~Paint]

Oh I know...I am going to have my girlfriend help me out...we do it for each other all time, i love her to death and am lucky to have her as a friend! She's like my sister!

[HeartofSteel]

If I understood all that correctly, it sounds to me like your not sure you want to still be with your boyfriend? is that correct? Personally, if I'm dating someone I don't text, call, hang out, ect.. with other guys because it leads to problems. You start thinking there better than your current boyfriend and just is a mess. If your serious about your current boyfriend then I think you shouldn't need the attention from this friend.

[<3_RedDuns!]

I think it's ok just because girls and guys are two TOTALLY different well...human beings. :doh:



I have guy friends i go to all the time for advice.

[WP~Paint]

I can honestly say I love my boyfriend...I think we both just had bad days. Most of my friends are guys, I don't get along with girls too well...My man doesn't care, I have already asked if he cares that most of my friends are guys, he knows I won't cheat on him. I think my other friend is the friend I can go to for guy advice on anything, not just relationship stuff, and I have told him that I am the kind of person that will help you out...I always have people comming to me for advice, so I think that is all the farther it is, were friends and we can give each other advice on life. I do love my boyfriend though and hate that yesterday was kinda a rough day. I bout cried, I have fighting that much. But as my mom said, it's been a month, so it's not super serious...so I'm just going to see how things go and take it from there...If he keeps blowing off our plans, which he said we were going out sometime this weekend and I could have sworn he said Friday, but if it keeps happening, then I won't take it...I don't care he goes out with friends, but I won't be blown off, I deserve better, anyone does...It's all still new, so I'll just have to see what happens. Maybe I over reacted...It's been forever since I have been in a new relationship, so I'm trying to get used to it. Thanks guys, I don't know what I'd do with out ya'll!

[quest]

I don't see how there is anything wrong with having a guy as a real good friend and having a different boyfriend. Your boyfriend should be number one though and the one you share things with and your go to. However, I would just advise you to be careful and not make it seem as if there is more than just interest as a friend in this guy. If your boyfriend found out you were sharing things with this other guy that you won't even share with him, he may become suspcious and have reason to think you don't trust him and think you might be intereted in more than just a friendship with this guy. Then again, maybe this boyfriend just isn't the type that is great to help problem solve, has a lot of trust in you, and won't have a problem with a really good frienship with this guy. I think it all depends on your boyfriend and only you know him well enough to decide whether or not it would be a good idea

[vicklynn]

Guys and gals CAN be friends.
I spent the night with another womans husband in colorado, while the wife took care of my place and my husband was out on the road. Same hotel room, sep beds, and not even a thought of anything fishy.
It is far and few that can do that, I know that.
I dont believe in once a cheater always a cheater either. I cheated in my younger yrs, but when I grew up, I changed. The sex thing is not about the other person, its about yourself and who you are.

Not that the cheating thing had anything to do with it, but it does kinda, me and another womans husband in the same room thing.

I think it really depends on you hon. If you can talk to this male and he talk to you and NO feelings EVER come up, then your fine. IF you ever get a feeling, even a tinge, RUN, cause one day, yup, its gonna happen, you'll do something you will regret.