Mandy
11-04-2008, 10:14 AM
I always wanted to share this story with a certain forum member, but I decided to share it with everyone. I really don't tell many people this story, not even my family knows.
When I was three my parents were getting a divorce, I remember that they would scream at each other in the hallway and I was always scared. My father was prone to violence, he was doing a lot of cocaine at the time, and while I obviously didn't understand drugs, I did understand fear.
I would cry quietly in my room, I don't know if they were actually screaming, but they were sure fighting. It would have been easier for me if I could sleep at night, but I've never been able to (since I was born). That night I was so frightened and I don't know why, but I was. I can't imagine what was going through my mind when this was happening, but I do know that all of the sudden there was a BEAUTIFUL girl at the foot of my bed.
I was scared, because I've never seen her before, but she looked so familar. She was young, and just gorgeous, freckles, auburn hair - just like my family. She was glowing, this gold color that was warm and the one thing I remember the most, was that it felt safe. The glow extended to my bed and I felt so sleepy and comfortable, she told me that I would never have a reason to be afraid, that bad things were going to happen but I would get through them all, she knew I would because she was watching me always and that the glow would always protect me.
I remember asking her what her name was, and she told me Elizabeth and she sat at the edge of my bed until I fell asleep wrapped in this gold glow. I remember when she touched me it was a feeling I will never be able to describe other than perfect safety. I was protected, from everything and I knew that NOTHING would be able to hurt me, it wasn't even the feeling of protection that you get from your mother when you are a child, this was MORE.
Even typing this wants to make me cry, it brings me back and I cannot describe how wonderful I felt that night, I knew that everything was going to be ok, that I was safe no matter what, and I have never felt like that again.
Now I'm not a religious person, but I know she was an angel. You see, I didn't know this until I was twelve, and I had never spoke a word of this story to anyone, but my aunt, my mother's younger sister, was born a twin. They didn't know my Grandma was pregnant with twins, and when she gave birth, they left the room after my one aunt was gone, even though my Grandma said she thought there was another baby. Elizabeth was born larger than my Aunt, and healthier too, but the cord was wrapped around her neck and since there were no doctors in the room to help my grandma, she died.
I know it was her, and I know she's my angel.
I'm not religious, I guess I have a reason to be, but I have always believed in angels and I know that some how, I will always be ok. She promised. I always want to tell this story to my aunt, it was her sister, and some day I think that I will. I know that if I ever have a daughter her name will be Elizabeth. I want to tell my Grandma too, but I think it would just upset her, she's never been to Elizabeth's grave.
Some day I'll go, if it was closer I would go all the time, but she's buried in Chicago.
Anyway, I wanted to share this story, it seemed important that I did.
When I was three my parents were getting a divorce, I remember that they would scream at each other in the hallway and I was always scared. My father was prone to violence, he was doing a lot of cocaine at the time, and while I obviously didn't understand drugs, I did understand fear.
I would cry quietly in my room, I don't know if they were actually screaming, but they were sure fighting. It would have been easier for me if I could sleep at night, but I've never been able to (since I was born). That night I was so frightened and I don't know why, but I was. I can't imagine what was going through my mind when this was happening, but I do know that all of the sudden there was a BEAUTIFUL girl at the foot of my bed.
I was scared, because I've never seen her before, but she looked so familar. She was young, and just gorgeous, freckles, auburn hair - just like my family. She was glowing, this gold color that was warm and the one thing I remember the most, was that it felt safe. The glow extended to my bed and I felt so sleepy and comfortable, she told me that I would never have a reason to be afraid, that bad things were going to happen but I would get through them all, she knew I would because she was watching me always and that the glow would always protect me.
I remember asking her what her name was, and she told me Elizabeth and she sat at the edge of my bed until I fell asleep wrapped in this gold glow. I remember when she touched me it was a feeling I will never be able to describe other than perfect safety. I was protected, from everything and I knew that NOTHING would be able to hurt me, it wasn't even the feeling of protection that you get from your mother when you are a child, this was MORE.
Even typing this wants to make me cry, it brings me back and I cannot describe how wonderful I felt that night, I knew that everything was going to be ok, that I was safe no matter what, and I have never felt like that again.
Now I'm not a religious person, but I know she was an angel. You see, I didn't know this until I was twelve, and I had never spoke a word of this story to anyone, but my aunt, my mother's younger sister, was born a twin. They didn't know my Grandma was pregnant with twins, and when she gave birth, they left the room after my one aunt was gone, even though my Grandma said she thought there was another baby. Elizabeth was born larger than my Aunt, and healthier too, but the cord was wrapped around her neck and since there were no doctors in the room to help my grandma, she died.
I know it was her, and I know she's my angel.
I'm not religious, I guess I have a reason to be, but I have always believed in angels and I know that some how, I will always be ok. She promised. I always want to tell this story to my aunt, it was her sister, and some day I think that I will. I know that if I ever have a daughter her name will be Elizabeth. I want to tell my Grandma too, but I think it would just upset her, she's never been to Elizabeth's grave.
Some day I'll go, if it was closer I would go all the time, but she's buried in Chicago.
Anyway, I wanted to share this story, it seemed important that I did.