my daughter got accepted into T-1!!

[shelsnsaus]

My middle daughter's birthday is the cut off date for school enrollment. She had to be 5 by Aug. 31 to go to kindergarten this year, and her birthday was Aug 31. She literally is the youngest student in the class; nearly a year younger than most of the kids. This has presented challenge after challenge for us since preschool. Academically she is on par with the rest of the students, however socially she has always been a bit delayed (she's normal for her age, but delayed compared to the rest of the kids in her class). Every year we've made the decision, with help from her current teachers, on what program to send her to last minute. Literally this year the decision to give kindergarten a try was made 5 days before school started.

Our school district offers a program called T-1, transitional first grade. We KNOW this year that Gwen could academically do the first grade program next year, however, we also know that her social level would present more challenges in learning than in years past. T-1 is a transitional program where the kids go a full day and learn more based on their learnings in kindergarten. They get a extra year to socially mature and aren't repeating the same kindergarten curriculum. They also have more change ups and more free time than they would have in first grade.

The teachers in the school decide which students aren't quite mature enough for first grade, but are academically on par with first grade readiness and hand those list over to the school counselor. The counselor than tests each student and they receive a numerical value. There are 5 elementary schools in my school district, and there were over 400 applicants to this program, they choose the highest scoring kids (only15 of them). Their goal is to get the kids who would most benefit from the program with and extra year to emotionally mature, but in no need of "extra" help academically. The students who need extra help academically would be best served to repeat kindergarten.

Anyway, in a nutshell, my daughter was accepted into the program based on the initial testing alone. Of course there are parents who will choose not to send their kids and the program will offer the opening to other parents down the line. I have a meeting tomorrow to see how all this will work out for my daughter.

I love the sound of the program and how it will help, however, it is at an entirely different school, different teachers, 9 students she won't see again until middle school will be in her class, and my daughter is slow to adjust to major changes. She has yet to be in the same school with the same kids since she started preschool at age 3. The start to kindergarten was rough this year and it took her nearly 2 months to enjoy going. Now she loves it! However, I'm worried about what it will do to her socially to have the anxiety of all new kids, teachers, and school next year; adjust, and than change it all again the following year when she comes back to our school for first grade. I guess that is my only real concern, although given time, which they assure me they do. I'm sure she'll thrive. I've also been assured that when the kids go back to their district schools for first grade, every effort is made for them to start their class with the other T-1 students from their school in their class. There will be 3 other T-1 students from Gwen's school.

I've been through making the wrong choices with my oldest and in hind sight realize I should have held her back a year long ago. She makes the grade, but just barely and school has always been a struggle for her. I lived the life and the daily struggle year after year with her, and don't want to do that again with any of my other children. I also don't want to make the wrong choice. That choice can't be undone, as I've come to realize with my oldest looking back. Raising kids sure isn't easy...but you certainly learn alot!

[Tatesgram]

When my oldest was in the fourth grade, he tested gifted with an IQ of 139. The teachers talked to me and my husband about sending him to a different school, where he would have classes that would keep his mind occupied and be more of a challenge.

He always had an attention problem, today, they would probably want to give him drugs :(. His teachers loved him, he always aced tests and school work, was a trial to do homework, but had no problems passing. Sometimes goofed off in class because he was bored.

Well, we decided to send him. He hated it, begged me all the time to let him go back to school with his friends. His grades were passing, but I didn't feel he was getting the benefits he should of been, simply because he hated so much.

So, I gave in and let him go back to regular school. Did I make the right decision? I don't know. Would it have make a difference in his life if I had made him go to the other school? I don't know. I do know he was happier going to school with the kids that lived in our neighborhood.

And hey, I still think he's and exceptional kid ;). Even if he is 36 :).

We never know if it's the right decision. And you can't base the decision for one child on how another handled a situation. Different kids, different reactions. But you know your kids better than anyone else. And you'll do what you think is right.

My :2cents:.

Just some questions: How long do they think it will take her to mature and catch up with her classmates? By 2nd or 3rd grade? After?

[grandmadeb]

My younger daughter was the youngest in her kindergarten and academically was doing fine. However, her teacher thought she was a bit socially immature and thought it best for her to repeat kindergarten. We agreed and the next year was so different. She was not invited to a single birthday party that first year and the second year it seems like we were constantly buying gifts for birthday parties.
As a teacher, the decision to not send a child onto the next grade is never made lightly. In 33 years of teaching I can count on one hand the number of kids that repeated from my class. It can the gift of a year to grow and mature.

[Remali]

What a tough decision. It just seems like these days kids start school so young....I guess if I had kids I would let them wait a bit, school seems more difficult nowadays and they seem to pile on more homework than they did back in the "old days"....I don't have kids, so I'm just basing that on what some of my friends went thru with their kids.

[star197]

Sounds like a very progressive school program! Our son was in a similar situation. His birthday is September 6th, so we weren't sure to start him in kindergarten when he was just turning 5 or turning 6. We decided to wait until he was 6 - he started k. last September and is doing well. He's not way ahead academically either - up towards the top but not bored or anything like that. So far, out of all the parents that I've talked to that have done the same thing - not one has regretted the decision.

As everyone else has said though, it really does depend on the individual child. If your daughter goes to the T-1 class and does well in it...would they start her in 2nd grade the following year?

[shelsnsaus]

When my oldest was in the fourth grade, he tested gifted with an IQ of 139. The teachers talked to me and my husband about sending him to a different school, where he would have classes that would keep his mind occupied and be more of a challenge.

He always had an attention problem, today, they would probably want to give him drugs :(. His teachers loved him, he always aced tests and school work, was a trial to do homework, but had no problems passing. Sometimes goofed off in class because he was bored.

Well, we decided to send him. He hated it, begged me all the time to let him go back to school with his friends. His grades were passing, but I didn't feel he was getting the benefits he should of been, simply because he hated so much.

So, I gave in and let him go back to regular school. Did I make the right decision? I don't know. Would it have make a difference in his life if I had made him go to the other school? I don't know. I do know he was happier going to school with the kids that lived in our neighborhood.

And hey, I still think he's and exceptional kid ;). Even if he is 36 :).

We never know if it's the right decision. And you can't base the decision for one child on how another handled a situation. Different kids, different reactions. But you know your kids better than anyone else. And you'll do what you think is right.

My :2cents:.

Just some questions: How long do they think it will take her to mature and catch up with her classmates? By 2nd or 3rd grade? After?


She is on par with other kids who are 5 1/2 going on 6. However, most of her classmate are 6 going on 7, some will be 7 by the start of first grade or very shortly there after. Deciding what to do with her has always been a challenge as developmentally she is rather intelligent for her age, however emotionally and socially she is a normal 5 year old. Its definitely a challenge keeping her mentally stimulated while accommodating the shorter attention span of a 5 year old.

No matter which way I look at it she is always going to be the oldest or the youngest child in the class. Testing wise she has always tested grade ready, however she doesn't have the attention span the older kindergartners do. My daughter literally turned 5 on the cut off date for kindergarten. There were several kids in her class who turned 6 withing the first 3 weeks of school. Over half her class was 6 by christmas. She literally, age wise, is nearly a year younger than most of her class. It can make a huge difference when they are younger, but typically evens out a bit each year they are older.

[4myquarter]

Shels -

Very good decision. I want to recommend a book to you. It is called Outliers by Malcolm Caldwell. He will reinforce, from many different perspectives, how wise and important the decision you made was. For everyone else reading this... buy it ... a good read and will opens your eyes. That is all I will say. Way to go Shels.:)

[shelsnsaus]

It is amazing all that is required of kindergarten now. When I went 30 years ago, it wasn't even mandatory. When my oldest went 8 years ago, she learned, had homework, but it wasn't as curriculum based as it is now. Gwen, in kindergarten can read, recogonize and spell over 30 words. Count to 1000, by 1's and 5's. Can read, and write her address and phone number. She wrote me a card the other day all by herself. She wrote "I love you mom". She's big into labeling all her pictures. home, dog, sun, tree etc. She reads me books now at bedtime instead of vise versa!

[oursarge]

They do that in kindergarten?! It sure has changed. When I was in Kindergarten 40+ yrs ago we learned to write our name, we spent the day coloring and I think we learned numbers and match shapes. We didn't read at all 'til 1st grade. I think back then Kindergarten was more like nursery school is now because none of us really went to anything before Kindergarten because back in the '50s most of the women in the area stayed home while the men went off to work every day. Kindergarten was our first time away from our mothers in most cases.

I had a hard time, I was so backwards [still am, I can type stuff here but in person unless I know you well I hardly talk] but I liked my teacher and the kids in class. In May my father got transferred with his job, it was a temp. thing and we had to move to Binghampton for a few months. I had to change schools in May! That about sent me over the edge, I HATED that teacher she was so mean and a real horrid woman. She should not have been there. That really set me back and I think has led to problems I still have. Thankfully I got back to the school I loved and kids I knew when I went to 1st grade. I remember being so scared they wouldn't remember me but they did so I had friends.

It is very hard for a shy kid to move. We moved when I was in 8th grade and again I had a terrible time and never forgave my parents for pulling me out of a school I loved and sending me to one I hated. I didn't know anyone and I was scared to death. The only good thing that came from that is that I made 2 good friends, one we lost to cancer but we were friends 'til her death, the other I'm still friends with. It's a real hard decision for you, it's like a no win thing it's either let her stay with kids she knows but she might struggle or take her from the people she knows so she might not struggle in 1st grade. Is there something in between like spending time with more kids her age in riding lessons or dance class or play dates, something she likes to do that will help her catch up to the others on a social level and then she can stay with her class? Have you asked her what she wants to do?

Our nephew started school the day after he was 5 and he struggled 'til he quit but he had learning problems in addition to social problems. Good luck it is a very hard decision.

[shelsnsaus]

Today I had the opportunity to talk to several other moms who also have struggled over the past years on whether to send their children or not. None of them have regretted their decision and several moms really wanted all of their younger children to go as well. I met with the guidance counselor, other moms, Gwen's current teacher, her new teacher and Gwen went as well. It was a lot of information, but my daughter is pretty excited about it. One of the other qualifying kids is in her class in kindergarten this year. She has friends, but no super close friends that she can't do without. She's ok with this. Next Monday Gwen and I will go over and "observe" her class for next year. Gwen isn't shy shy so I'm probably more worried than I need to be. After all, she's been in a different school with different kids for the past 3 years, each and every year, and she's always made friends, had fun, and loved school. I think she'll be fine. The school makes every effort for the transition on the kids to be easy. Her new teacher is very cool and Gwen loved her the minute she met her. Gwen's teacher this year will be involved with the transition next year as well. I'm really excited about some of the things they will be doing next year, including putting on a play. She'll have an opportunity that very few other children get, and those that have... absolutely blossomed. This is a program specifically designed for children like Gwen who have super late birthdays or are just a bit slower to mature socially!

[oursarge]

That sounds really good, I'm happy it seems like it's going to all work out. I thought maybe she was really shy like I was and this would be hard on her but it sounds like a good situation for everyone. It sounds like a good program, I don't think our district has it. I know they didn't when our nephew was in school since he really should have repeated Kindergarten but they didn't want him to have that following him all through his school years that he didn't pass Kindergarten so they made the school put him into 1st grade and he was always behind both socially and with his school work. This would have been something good for him but it's too late now he's like 23!!!

Not on topic but how is Noelle doing in her new home? Hope she's doing fine.

[Apaches Mom]

My oldest daughter is the youngest in her class. She barely made the cut off. And she struggled all through school. She made c's so she passed but it was always seemed to be a struggle. Academically and Emotionally.

My youngest daughter missed the cut off by 9 days. And I had the option of tsting her and sending her on into K. I knew she could pass the test but I figured she'd be better off waiting a year. She is the oldest in her class (she's a sophmore now) by a long shot. But life is so much easier for her than it was her sister. She gets straight A's.

I realize they are two individuals and the age is only part of the whole picture. But I do think my youngest being older and more mature has definitely helped her.

I think it's a great program and wish we had something around here like that!!! Congrats on your daughter getting in!

[shelsnsaus]

That sounds really good, I'm happy it seems like it's going to all work out. I thought maybe she was really shy like I was and this would be hard on her but it sounds like a good situation for everyone. It sounds like a good program, I don't think our district has it. I know they didn't when our nephew was in school since he really should have repeated Kindergarten but they didn't want him to have that following him all through his school years that he didn't pass Kindergarten so they made the school put him into 1st grade and he was always behind both socially and with his school work. This would have been something good for him but it's too late now he's like 23!!!

Not on topic but how is Noelle doing in her new home? Hope she's doing fine.

I'm really happy about it all. When I initially learned of the program earlier this year and the small number of kids accepted I figured we'd be looking at repeating kindergarten or pushing through first grade. I am thrilled she got in, and the few concerns I had were very much eased today. I have two more appointments to observe the class (after today) and before the end of the year, but I know she'll do fine.

As far as Noelle? She is doing fabulously. I see her every weekend, she is out playing in daycare now and acting no worse for the wear. She is up to the weight she should be and seems to think she is the overseer out on the field. She'll play beautifully with the others, however if anyone starts to get out of line, Noelle quickly puts them in their place. Goofy girl. She still gets specialized treatment, and stays in the office during down time. She's always super excited to see me each weekend, and she loves it when my dog Banjo is at daycare when she is. She is having issues with my new foster. She won't let me pet him and gets all silly when I insist that I can. She is well loved, well adjusted, and looks great!